Hold on. I’m in no way a poet or a rapper or whatever… I just happened to “write” this… it came to me at 3:17 am on Saturday, April 3… I recorded it on my phone. This is the unedited version. Straight from my phone.
“This is called, ‘This is what he does to me’
This is what he does to me
he makes me smile
everytime i think of him
he’s smiling back at me
and so why wouldn’t I smile?
This is what he does to me
This is what he does to me
when he lays with me
his arm around me
like i’m the only girl in the world
only to find out that he makes every girl he’s with
feel like the only girl in the world
and This is what he does to me
This is what he does to me
he makes me feel like I’m a princess
but then to find out that it’s relentless
back and forth he goes
from one girl to another
to me and to the other…
one of his victims…
puts that innocent smile on his face
and I think that easily I can be replaced
but yet I still I continue to go after
something that is sought after
by so many others
… and still I’m caught up
makes me wanna throw up
makes me wanna give up
This is what he does to me
This is what he does to me
he makes me think
he makes me wonder
he makes me ask myself, “Is it me?”
This is what he does to me
he makes me angry
he makes me wanna sock someone in the fucking face
he makes me want to hurt somebody
This is what he does to me
This is what he does to me
he makes me fall in love… . hmmmmm… or maybe not (laugh)
This is what he does to me
he makes me feel like heaven and hell wrapped up in one
and when he’s done
I’m left alone in purgatory
to tell my story…
This is how he makes me feel. . .
This is how he makes me feel…
like. I. am. not good enough. (beat)
I couldn’t do it right. (beat)
like I messed up somewhere along the way…
and even if i am the girl of his dreams…
he would. never. want. me.
This is what he does to me…
he makes me shake
in anger
and in pain
and what trips me out the most…
is that the next guy will do that to me
and the next guy
and the next guy
and this is what they will continue to do to me
until I realize for myself that it’s not about
what he does to me…
it’s about but what I WANT for me.”
Wow… I’ve posted some really personal things, but for some reason, I feel like sharing this is the most intimate thing that I’ve shared on the internet. Please treat this with care. It’s my soul on paper… don’t judge me. Thanks.
